Big picture??? Here's the big picture. I AM STUCK HERE. I am stuck in where I am and I will be stuck here if I don't start with anything. I AM 28 and am no one. I AM ALONE. I am manipulated. They won't take seriously what I want to do. That's the big picture. Easy for you to say. You're not here. You were able to do what you want. You were able to go to wherever you are right now. You have work. You're not alone. You have family. You're not being manipulated.
I hated you when you left. I hated you because you left me here. You left me here with them. From now on, it doesn't matter what you think with what I want to do. I will just start looking solutions for my terribly, miserable life.